4.01.2009

Irritations #1

1.  Where the fuck is the # key on a Mac keyboard?

2.  Ever watch Ireland AM? 
It's early morning chewing gum, inoffensive at best. But there's one item so galling it chills me to my very core. I dread the bits where Ireland AM's "Queen of Baking" Catherine Leyde bakes a sponge and yer man with the stubby fat cake fingers comes in and grabs handfuls. Then he proceeds to talk to camera with crumbs flying everywhere. Terrifying.

The Cake Monster

3.  Picture the scene; you are out walking the dog or some other lame ass suburban activity, a group of quite tough teens are playing football near you and an overkicked ball trickles over to your feet. 
'Well boy, pass it back will ya?' one of the acned hooligans hollers at you. You are gripped with fear - will I trip as I go to kick the ball, will I toe poke it, what if I miss the target, I hope these young gentlemen don't give me an awful ribbing - and you step up to kick the ball back.

You've pictured the scene? 

Good, well I hate that.

4.  Alan Shearer new manager of Newcastle: FAIL

1 comment:

  1. An acquaintance of mine, Mick Quinn, was doing the cookery spot on Ireland AM this week. He got lucky - Fat Fingers wasn't there, it was yer man with the dyed blonde hair and the chesire grin instead. I think I'd stab your man in the back of the hand with my fork if I saw those chubby appendages coming for grub I'd slaved over!

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